For the uninitiated, you can't run the specified browser on Linux any more than you can mix oil and water.

"Hold your index finger out in front of your face. In less time than it would take a beam of light to travel from your knuckle to your fingertip, the new IBM chip would complete one task and start looking for the next."

Oh.  Of course.  Wow - it's faster than...the bird?

Let's face it, if you don't understand that 5 billion is a really big number, then your grasp of a fundamental physical constant isn't going to shed much light on the subject (pun most certainly intended).

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

 

Just got back from vacation.  Me, my Lady Friend and the beloved urchins did our usual Door County jaunt last week.  Had quite an experience at the Harbor Fish Market & Grille (a.k.a., "The Mailing It Inn").  Good christ, if I wanted to eat Ponderosa quality food, I'd go to, well - Ponderosa - and pay one-third the price.  Oh yeah, pay no attention to the prices on their site - that was from five years ago or something, because they're significantly higher now.  I wouldn't feed their overpriced food to my dog.  And they were only borderline apologetic when we complained too.  Dicks.

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Today, some of my younger co-workers were singing the praises of cheap, frozen pizza.  Naturally, I had to drop some of my, uh, wisdom on them.

"The problem with Jack's pizza is that you open it up, and can't tell which parts to cook 'n eat, and which to throw away."

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Oh, in case you were wondering, that quitting smoking thing seems to be working out.  I actually started again in late December, after my last post about the subject, but quit again in February, after I started taking Chantix.  Chantix (aside from some off-tha-hook dreams) really rocks.  It's been over 6 weeks since my last cigarette.  I've also gained about 10 pounds.

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This is a really amazing video that shows you why our perceptions of beauty have become really skewed:  Dove, enhanced beauty

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Oh yeah, I've updated the look of the site, too.  It's even more nauseatingly Web 2.0-ish.  Can ya dig(g) it?

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The other day, I asked friend/co-worker Paul, "What do you call something that's really stupid and pointless and you can't help but watch it?"

His response: "The Internet."

They've come quite a ways since I first tried one years ago, because now, in addition to designing and "building" a roller coaster, you can build a whole park - complete with people.  Given that you're building the coasters...and placing the people...can you guess where this is going?  Oh yeah - Virtual People Bowling.  That's some seriously funny shit.

Less Violence, More Learning
Last week, a couple of my co-workers brought Phun to my attention.  Phun is a free program built by a physics student from Sweden.  It has a rudimentary physics engine and really cool, simple tools which allow you to build things and, well, make those things...do stuff.  It's harder to explain than it is just to show you.  Yes, you can do violent things too.  Download Phun here.

Quote of the Week

"I'm gonna crockpot the shit out of some things."

- A young co-worker who recently purchased a home...and a crockpot.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

It's largely due to the plentiful and rather diverse talent pool this season.  The nurse from Indiana with the two-tone hair and the Drano voice is pretty interesting.  And there are at least a couple other girls and guys who are pretty talented and fun to watch, if a little mainstream.  But the other night, viewers were treated to a stunning performance from the person I believe will be this season's winner.  If not, he's still the most talented.  He's 17-year-old David Archuleta, and he performed a version of John Lennon's Imagine that I think John would have been proud of.

It seems to be some sort of homage to Jesus, and the 40 days he spent in the desert.  Having missed that tour, I had to read up on it.  Apparently, Jesus went into the desert for 40 days, was tempted by the Devil, but resisted temptation.  He refused to drink carbonated beverages or watch HBO, and scared the Devil off with some religious pamphlets.  2000 years later, Catholics celebrate this by torturing themselves for roughly six weeks.

I've heard of some fairly serious sacrifices, like giving up red meat.  That, to me, signifies some pretty serious commitment.  Others, I'm afraid, fall a little short of the mark.  My Lady Friend told me about a friend of hers who once gave up beer for lent.  Oh, really?  Any specific brands, or are you going for broke and giving up all malted beverages for the next six weeks?  Gonna have to tough it out on white zinfandel and Mad Dog 20/20, eh?  Man, you sure are devout.

Now if I were catholic, I'd really put it out there.  I'd give up highlighters and plastic forks for lent.  Maybe even my Trim™ nail clippers.