Down The Tube
Tuesday, September 27th, 2005Like most people, I grew up watching television. A LOT. Nary an evening passed where I wasn't glued to the tube for less than a seven hours. Eating dinner in front of the tube was not uncommon. Even as a young adult, TV ruled my evenings. The news, the sitcoms, the dramas, the syndicated classics - I watched them all. To this day, I can quote virtually any episode of M*A*S*H - ever. And to think they say America is culturally bankrupt.
And then something happened. I think it occurred around the time the (not) reality TV craze hit. It was at that point that television, in its entirety, jumped the shark. I began to watch less and less until, at some point, I just stopped. Cold turkey. It was easy - I didn't even need the patch. I went two years without even owning a TV.
The only TV I've watched since that point is pro football. It's pretty much the only thing I can watch. And I think it's alienating me from society. People try to engage me in conversation with "...did you see [Insert name of latest hot TV show here] last night?", to which I reply, "I don't watch TV." They stare blankly at me for a second, and then go on with their little story. I listen, smile politely, and make a half-hearted effort at pretending to care. When I fail to pick it up at my end, they usually falter and grasp at something else to say. It's not that I'm a TV snob - I just DON'T CARE.
I do have a TV again - a hand-me-down from Mom. I even went and bought an antenna, so I could watch football on Sunday and Monday. Talk about old school. While browsing the microscopic antenna selection at Best Buy, a salesman walked by and asked if I needed any help. I couldn't have made him run away from me any faster if I'd told him I was wearing a vest full of dynamite.
And then something happened. I think it occurred around the time the (not) reality TV craze hit. It was at that point that television, in its entirety, jumped the shark. I began to watch less and less until, at some point, I just stopped. Cold turkey. It was easy - I didn't even need the patch. I went two years without even owning a TV.
The only TV I've watched since that point is pro football. It's pretty much the only thing I can watch. And I think it's alienating me from society. People try to engage me in conversation with "...did you see [Insert name of latest hot TV show here] last night?", to which I reply, "I don't watch TV." They stare blankly at me for a second, and then go on with their little story. I listen, smile politely, and make a half-hearted effort at pretending to care. When I fail to pick it up at my end, they usually falter and grasp at something else to say. It's not that I'm a TV snob - I just DON'T CARE.
I do have a TV again - a hand-me-down from Mom. I even went and bought an antenna, so I could watch football on Sunday and Monday. Talk about old school. While browsing the microscopic antenna selection at Best Buy, a salesman walked by and asked if I needed any help. I couldn't have made him run away from me any faster if I'd told him I was wearing a vest full of dynamite.
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